I don’t know what to write.
I’m really happy I didn’t sign up for post-match duties on Saturday, because I legitimately don’t know what I was going to write. The manner in which BVB lost was so exhaustingly horrible that I had to mentally erase the existence of Borussia Dortmund from my consciousness just to enjoy the rest of my Saturday.
What’s crazy is that it was paradoxically both entirely predictable - BVB falling apart at the Allianz Arena is basically a given - and entirely unpredictable, in the sense that not even in our worst nightmares could we have imagined such a horribly slapstick manner in which Dortmund could fall apart.
We’ve seen some horrible mishaps (see this one, this one, or this one) in past iterations of Der Klassiker, but this one has to be the worst. The ball was rolling towards Gregor Kobel. Leroy Sane had already given up on the play. All he had to do was stand there and let it roll gently into his arms. Instead he tried to kick it out for some reason and he just... missed it? How?! How do you miss the fucking ball???
I’ve seen a lot of folks online play devil’s advocate, and I get it. Kobel has been great this year, and the players should not have let themselves get so easily deflated. A 1-0 in the 15th minute is far from an insurmountable deficit. On the other hand, you simply cannot play for a serious club fighting for a major European title and let that happen. I know professional footballers are supposed to be unshakeable mentality monsters, but it’s really hard to motivate yourself to keep pushing when your goalkeeper could completely botch a routine clearance and undo your progress at any time.
Writing this now, I only find myself shaking my head in exasperation. I was at a bar filled with Dortmund fans as the ball rolled into the net behind Kobel, and I’m pretty sure the reaction in the room wasn’t to scream or shout, but just to sit in stunned silence.
- Julian Nagelsmann is in talks with Chelsea after his recent sacking, and after Chelsea sacked Graham Potter this weekend. I guess Chelsea could beat Dortmund, but not Aston Villa.
- Emre Can defended Gregor Kobel in a post-match interview on Saturday, saying that the only reason they were chasing the title in the first place was because of Gregor Kobel.
The Daily Buzz
Of all the horrible BVB gaffes in recent Der Klassikers, which one was the worst? You can include the ones I linked above, this one, and any others I didn’t think of.