Good morning, Fear the Wall.
SC Freiburg Going to Berlin
SC Freiburg beat Hamburg to clinch a trip to the DFB Pokal Final. It’s now possible that they could both win the DFB Cup and qualify for the Champions League, all, of course, because of Nico Schlotterbeck.
Bayern Signing All of Ajax
With BVB plundering all of the Bundesliga’s star talent, in typical poverty franchise fashion, Bayern have resorted to plundering the Dutch League. Much like Barcelona and Juventus, this is surely the sign of a dying club making one last attempt to stay relevant. Bayern apparently watched Ajax smash BVB in the fall with a bulge in their pants, and are now doing everything they can to make a xerox copy of that team. According to Fabrizio Romano, Bayern are going to sign both Ryan Gravenberch and Noussair Mazraoui from Ajax.
Bayern are progressing at final stages of negotiations for Ryan Gravenberch and Noussair Mazraoui. Both are expected to join Bayern. #FCBayern— Fabrizio Romano (@FabrizioRomano) April 17, 2022
Oliver Kahn tells @sport1: "We don't speak about players who are under contract at other clubs. It's about respect for other teams". pic.twitter.com/gXKqWHPW4d
Beer the Wall
Even BVB’s English Twitter account are milking Footy Scran for content. €14 would *maybe* buy you one tall boy of Miller Lite or an equivalent domestic in the USA, but at the Westfalenstadion, it gets you an entire flight of six pints.
Beer shouldn’t be a luxury at a football match…welcome to Dortmund https://t.co/NqxWc0KaOA— Borussia Dortmund (@BlackYellow) April 19, 2022
Footy Scran of the Day: Something My Dog Might Puke Up
Over the last few days, Footy Scran of the Day has been far too appetizing. Mostly courtesy of Latin America, the food has consisted of actual appetizing-looking fried cheese breads. It’s time to get back to Footy Scran’s roots, with some indistinguishable £3 slop served over fries at a 7th tier English club.
On an entirely separate and unrelated note, here’s a chart showing all the different possible colors of dog vomit:
The Daily Buzz
What’s the best beer you’ve ever had at a football stadium?