Good morning, everyone!
At around 4:30 pm yesterday, after my roommate shouted through my door to me that Christian Pulisic had scored, I thought to myself, “Huh, Chelsea must be in the FA Cup or something.” It was only when I walked into my living room where the TV was on that I realized that the semifinals of the Champions League, the most prestigious tournament in club football, were in full swing, and I hadn’t even realized. It’s amazing what an attempted coup by a cabal of billionaires and a round of semifinals with four soulless multinational corporations masquerading as authentic football clubs can do to your enthusiasm for a sport.
The match in question was between Chelsea and Real Madrid, and I suppose the most notable thing about it for Borussia Dortmund fans was that Thomas Tuchel and Christian Pulisic, two BVB alumni, featured for the Blues.
Pulisic even scored a goal, and a particularly pretty one at that.
While Real Madrid equalized, Chelsea controlled the match, which ended 1-1, giving Chelsea slight away goal advantage headed back to Stamford Bridge.
Bayern and Germany Agree to What Now?
If you needed any proof that the Bundesliga is a total circus, here it is. According to Tom at Bavarian Football Works, who looks eerily like Niklas Süle so he obviously knows what he’s talking about, Bayern Munich are set to play the German National Team in a friendly over the summer, apparently to help Bayern recuperate financially for letting Die Mannschaft poaching Hansi Flick.
At some point this year, @FCBayernUS is slated to host a friendly match at the Allianz Arena vs. @DFB_Team_EN. Funds from the match will go towards Hansi Flick’s departure from #FCBayern before he moves to the #DFB https://t.co/ATsQEfz1l4— Bavarian Football Works (@BavarianFBWorks) April 28, 2021
I’m not sure how they’ll deal with the fact that certain players like Leon Goretzka, Joshua Kimmich, and Leroy Sané play for both the German national team and Bayern Munich. Maybe they’ll swap sides at half time.
Please Stop Hiring New Coaches
Guess what? Yet another Bundesliga club has hired a new manager! Only a few days after RB Leipzig announced that their head coach Julian Nagelsmann would move to Bayern Munich, they’ve already found their replacement, and I’m sure you will be SHOCKED by who it is.
BREAKING: Jesse Marsch to become the next head coach of RB Leipzig after a whirlwind 24 hours. Twists & turns in this since the announcement of Julian Nagelsmann‘s departure for Bayern. At one point, Oliver Glasner appeared to have overtaken Marsch in the pecking order.— Derek Rae (@RaeComm) April 28, 2021
We’re witnessing the Bundesliga food chain in action (in this case, the Bundesliga/Ö-Bundesliga food chain). Just as the mighty Bayern feeds on the RB Leipzig, the RB Leipzig feeds on its smaller prey, the RB Salzburg.
It’s certainly a good move. Marsch did very well bringing Salzburg to the Champions League, where they put in some good performances, even without the best results, against Bayern Munich and other bigger clubs. It will be interesting to see what the American can do with his most talented squad yet.
The Daily Buzz
What are some other methods that Bayern use to help finance the loss of Hansi Flick? I like to imagine that he’s got a really good Mohnstollen recipe, and that Bayern could sell them for a bake sale to help fund the transaction.