Who wants to relive the match that everyone is desperately trying to forget? Not me! But here I am, reliving it anyway.

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Manager

Thomas Tuchel: 2

I’ve been one of Tuchel’s defenders on this site, but even I can’t explain away this display. The players just showed a complete lack of motivation that I have to believe at least partly comes from the manager. Sure, some were tired from the Hertha Berlin match, but the squad was still rotated heavily. As for tactics, well, I really didn’t see any tactics whatsoever, other than poor attempts to play long balls from the back that rarely worked, and getting swamped out of possession in the midfield.

Starting XI:

Roman Bürki: 8

Yet again, I am deprived of the opportunity to make a “Swiss Cheese” joke. He surrendered two goals that he could in theory have stopped, but also made four or five quality saves that kept BVB in the match, including this bizarre sequence:

Erik Durm: 6

He played OK, I suppose. On the first Darmstadt goal, he more or less stood in front of Terrence Boyd and let him have a free shot, but I can forgive him for not making a challenge in the penalty area. His cross helped set up the Raphael Guerreiro goal, so it wasn’t all bad. +1 for the hair.

Sokratis: 6

If his performance against RB Leipzig was his “Battle of Marathon”, this match was his “Battle of Artemisium”. His passing was shaky, and he was caught out of position once or twice. Neither goal was strictly his fault, though.

Matthias Ginter: 5

Could have stepped up on the first Darmstadt goal, but instead chose to try and block the shot. It didn’t work. I understand why he started over Marc Bartra, who played 120 minutes on Wednesday.

Dzenis Burnic: 2

One day, young lad, but not today. (Err... Saturday.)

Julian Weigl: 4

Really could’t do much with the ball. Like so many times before, he was pressed an awful lot, and Raphael Guerreiro didn’t provide much help.

Raphael Guerreiro: 6

Scored a goal (always appreciated), but other than that his contributions were limited. I can’t stress enough how good Darmstadt’s midfield was compared to Dortmund’s. Come on Rapha, we’re just asking you to transition from being a left back to being a perfect Gündogan replacement, is that so much to ask???

Christian Pulisic: A clearly unbiased and objectively given 7

I thought he started out well and had some decent runs.

Emre Mor: 8

In my opinion, he was Dortmund’s best player (or at the very minimum, the most impactful.) He made some incisive runs and fired a neat cross that almost set up Aubameyang, who was a touch offside. His precise, controlled touch to set up Guerreiro for his goal was a thing of beauty.

Marco Reus: 5

He took the armband for what I believe was the first time this season. Around the 24th minute he got in one-on-one with the goalkeeper, but he couldn’t knick it over the keeper and into the net.

Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang: 4

I honestly don’t remember him contributing a thing, other than the cross from Emre Mor that was offside.

Substitutes:

Ousmane Dembélé: 5

I’ll give him a pass, because Tuchel decided to play him directly after his grandfather’s funeral. His turnover led directly to Antonio Colak’s goal.

Andre Schürrle: 5

Didn’t contribute much when brought on.

Shinji Kagawa: 4

Ditto.

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What are your ratings? Feel free to weigh in below.